Pin the Felony on the Football Player!

1. Which NFL player was convicted for running a dogfighting operation in 2007?
2. Baltimore Ravens players Ray Lewis, Reginald Oakley and Joseph Sweeting were indicted on charges of murder and aggravated assault following the stabbing deaths of Jacinth Baker and Richard Lollar at a post-Super Bowl XXXIV party in Atlanta. Oakley and Sweeting were acquitted. Lewis was the only one to be sentenced. What misdemeanor did he plead guilty to?
3. Johnny Jolly was indefinitely suspended from the NFL Green Bay Packers in July 2010. What was his crime?
4. What was Bears player Tank Johnson was arrested for, at his home in Chicago in 2006?
5. Who is the Minnesota Viking cornerback currently contesting two charges, including domestic assault by strangulation and third-degree assault for attacking his girlfriend in October 2011?
6. In 2004, Jamal Lewis was indicted for a deal he made in summer 2000. What was he indicted for?
7. In October 1998, Rams player Leonard Little drank and drove his SUV into Susan Gutweiler’s car, resulting in her death. What felony did he plead guilty to?
8. This Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver was recently convicted for trafficking marijuana, which carries a sentence of one to four years in prison?
9. Former NFL player and coach Corwin Brown awaits trial on three separate counts for a singular incident. What was the incident?
10. What former Detroit Lions running back is serving time at Lovelock Correctional Center for kidnapping, robbery, coercion and conspiracy?

Tiebreaker: According to CBS, what percentage of NFL players have been charged with at least one serious crime, including two murder arrests, seven rape charges, 45 counts of domestic violence and 42 charges of assault and battery?

Answers after the jump.

1. Michael Vick
2. Obstruction of Justice
3. July 8, 2008 possession of over 200 grams of codeine
4. Six counts of possessing an unlicensed gun
5. Chris Cook
6. Federal drug charges – conspiring to possess cocaine with the intent to distribute and using a cell phone in the commission of a crime
7. Involuntary Manslaugter
8. Jerome Simpson
9. Holding his wife hostage with a handgun – one count of class B felony criminal confinement, one count of class C felony criminal confinement, and one count of D Domestic Battery
10. O.J. Simpson

Tiebreaker: 21%

• Jan: the Gators win their second football championship in three years, largely due to Percy Harvin and Tim Tebow.
• Feb: we celebrate, realizing Amelia’s sleeping isn’t a fluke. (And we are celebrating still!)
• Mar: we travel to Florida to see family; I enjoy a very productive CCCC.
• Apr: a quick trip to southern Illinois; my brother and his wife meet us for hiking with the girls. Rainy but fun.
• May: we travel to Florida again, seeing different family this time, and friends in Gainesville too.
• June: I get tenure and a raise, and present at MEA with Jeff and Thomas.
• July: we get a new roof and gutters. I present at WPA.
• July: the girls and I spend a long week in Michigan, enjoying beaches from Grand Haven to Traverse City.
• August: We finish our kitchen upgrades.
• September: I ran a personal best in the Quad Cities half-marathon: 1:49:17.
• October: Madelyn and Amelia turn four and one.
• November: WIU approves my request for AY2010-11 sabbatical, not long after my summer stipend is funded as well.
• December: Amelia starts walking! And I finish 2009 with travel to Philadelphia to present at MLA. (More on that soon.)

Once again, a great year, and 2010 looks even better.

I’ve been sitting on some odds and ends blogging for a few weeks now. Time to catch up.

We stayed in Macomb for Thanksgiving this year. My parents visited Monday through Friday. They arrived late Monday and left early Friday, which means we only saw them three days. I wish they would stay longer. But we are happy to see them. Madelyn and Amelia got along great with Grammy and Grampy, and didn’t terrorize their dog Scooter too much. Tuesday we hung out; Wednesday we took a daytrip to Galesburg for the childrens museum and lunch at Landmark; Thursday we cooked and ate. The whole time (and all break week) Madelyn resisted naps like crazy, which means my parents got to see her in full-on spaz mode. More than once, my mom looked at me as if to say, “Um, you were a little hyper, but this girl takes the cake.” Yes she does.

What did we eat for Thanksgiving? I cooked a pair of chickens in our (salvaged from the trash) electric smoker. Erin roasted potatoes, onions, and brussels sprouts, and made whole wheat buttermilk rolls–a day after she made a cheese and butternut squash strata. So. much. bread. But I loved it. For dessert, Erin made apple-cranberry pie, pumpkin pie (using pumpkins from our yard, though not the tree pumpkins), and I made vanilla ice cream. Yum, yum. Since then, I’ve been trying to put in some extra miles–and not by making trips to the refrigerator.

After my parents left, I spent Thanksgiving weekend grading (web projects and essays), watching football, and doing laundry, with some break time to take care of the girls.

And speaking of football, it is championship Saturday. Big East (de facto), Conference USA, SEC, and then the Big 12/ACC double bill. Obviously, I’ll be watching the SEC championship attentively. For me, neither Florida nor Alabama have distinguished themselves in the manner they did last year, and the game could go either way. Poo on Carlos Dunlap for getting loaded and kicked out of this one. But last year, Florida beat Alabama without Percy Harvin. They can beat Alabama without Dunlap. And I hope they do.

Winter seems to have arrived, so we probably aren’t going to finish the back porch painting this year. We’re really close, though–just some touchups after the second coat. I’m sure our neighbors are much happier to be looking at the back of our house now. Right now I’ve got a few dilapidated storm windows in the basement for a quick couple coats of paint. Just hoping to get another year out of them.

I am still not brewing. Feh. I’ve had some conversations with some friends about a group brew. Maybe that’ll kick me in the butt and I’ll get something going.

Edit 12/5: Alabama 32, Florida 13. I was wrong about Dunlap not being missed. Alabama played extremely well and Florida played miserably. The Tide were better in all phases of the game.

Dear cbdilger,

Your video Mr Moreno meets Mr Spikes has become popular on YouTube, and we’d like to invite you to start making money from it by including it in the YouTube Partnership Program

Making money from your video is easy. Here’s how it works: First sign into your YouTube account cbdilger. Then, complete the steps outlined here: [link redacted]. Once you’re finished, we’ll start placing ads next to your video and pay you a share of the revenue.

We look forward to adding your video to the YouTube Partnership Program. Thanks and good luck!

The YouTube Team

The mechanism here is easy to imagine: at a certain number of views, YouTube kicks out this email. Just one of the ways they encourage content providers to “monetize” YouTube (e.g. the recent popularity of a wedding video with a Chris Brown song; instead of shutting it down, the record company involved added a “Buy this song” link. Smart.). However, this isn’t “my” video. It’s a clip I’ve shared assuming that doing so meets fair use criteria:

1. it’s a non-commercial use
2. the work in question is nonfiction
3. amount of work reproduced is very small (0:30 of 2:00 or more), though significance is high (Spikes and Moreno are arguably the best two players on the field, both future NFLers)
4. impact on market value is low, given #3

Now, if I sign up for the program, #1 changes, and the fair use argument is considerably weakened. I wonder if CBS and other rights holders consider these programs when making decisions about shutdowns. Or do they automagically get a cut as well?

I have half a mind to sign up, just to see what happens.

Edit 10/1: Once I started the signup process, I discovered all was not as IP-blissful as I thought.

Me? Sure, I’d like to be able to watch a little grid this weekend. But a little time away is a good thing, be it football or anything else. I didn’t watch much NFL football last year, and I don’t expect to watch much next year. The grind of injuries and player cuts has sucked the life out of it for me.

Thankfully, part of the fusillade Larry and Moe leveled at McNabb involved a cardboard box with “Go Cards” written on it. Said box also had an address on it. Now the perps are busted. And, I suspect much worse for them, they’ve opened themselves up to retaliation from Eagles fans—you know, the ones who are so polite and well-behaved, they had a courtroom in their stadium.

Three cheers for McNabb for taking the high road here. May these morons get what they deserve.

• Jan 5: Madelyn starts the Big Girl sleep plan. I’m happy to say this continues; the Bee is pretty easy to put to bed now.
• Feb 21: I get an awful flu bug, missing classes and losing eight pounds in less than a week.
• Mar 10: A misstep down the stairs, and I sprain my Achilles, putting a serious kink in my running. In the long term, this is a good thing; since then I’ve been swimming and biking pretty regularly and my fitness is much better balanced.
• Apr 28: Our new graduate curriculum is approved. Bye-bye to periodic literature courses; hello to writing studies, theses or exams for everyone, and individual programs of study.
• May 15-25: Erin, Madelyn and I enjoy a great vacation in Wisconsin and Michigan.
• Jun 5: Strawberries! Our yard is full of ‘em. We enjoy ice cream, jam, and strawberry pie.
• Jul 22: The awful ugly counters come out of our kitchen.
• Aug 20: My release time technology work ends. I don’t miss this one bit.
• Oct 3: Jeff and I get the contracts for From A to <A>. (Essays are due tomorrow, 1/1/09. One step closer.)
• Oct 27: Amelia is born.
• Dec 19: Our power is knocked out by an ice storm. We spend a night at a friends’ house; the following day I spend 18 hours making up for lost grading time.

All in all, a fine year. Thanks, 2008; more like you, please.

Still, I wonder why the hell college football won’t do better than three coaches of color. Only Gill, Shannon, and Sumlin for one hundred and nineteen teams. And with few assistants at high-profile programs, this problem isn’t going to get better soon.

Update 12/4: EDSBS on the issue, spot on as usual.

Penn State is undefeated. Joe Paterno is 81 years old. He’s got me beat by 40+. If I should be so lucky to hit 81, can I please be 1% as amazing as Joe? One condition: no simpering sentimental ESPN-tributes allowed.